I'm So Confused...

Parents: Now, honey, never ever, ever take candy from strangers.

How the heck did Halloween get invented?

A Little Birdie Sings

The following quote is a tweet: (haha, get the pun from the title)

How do we know Gangnam Style isn't a rain dance? We brought Hurricane Sandy upon ourselves. :)

Dear Readers,

Hi guys! Just to let you know, these are original quotes by yours truly. Never copied from somewhere else!
I solemnly swear to milk.

My sense of humor continues...

That annoying moment when you step into shower and you realize you forgot a washcloth.

Introductions...

Hey viewers! I'm here for advice, to dish out funny quotes and to prove that no matter how sour, milk cartons can dance. Peace, love, milk.